Money, money, money

If anyone tells you there`s a recession on at the moment then they are talking Bollocks. Believe me. Having spent a week in Monaco for the Grand Prix there is certainly money floating about here, and most of it is, quiet literally floating.

If you take a look around the Monaco Harbour every last inch is crammed with over-polished white fibreglass and gold. These are not just normal yachts, or even super yachts these are Mega yachts. The average price of which is somewhere between 140-200 Million US Dollars. If you then consider that Monaco harbour is home to around 50 of these mega yachts over the Grand Prix weekend then we are talking about 9 Billion Dollars of value just floating around in the harbour.

This 9 billion dollars is then providing the background for 24 drivers to race their priceless cars around for about 2 hours on a Sunday.
Between these 24 drivers their total wage bill for the year is around 120 Million Dollars.

If you add up the value of the cars parked outside the Monaco Casino it would still be a fairly substantial figure, never mind the money that is trading hands inside the casino. And that is just the cost of buying a drink.

And then the total running costs of all F1 teams each year is around 3 Billion dollars.
Money really is not an issue around here.

This is all very well especially as I believe that I had the best seat in the house during the race on Sunday. To watch F1 cars at speed around the narrow streets of Monaco is super impressive, especially from the close quarters that we are permitted as F1 photographers.
The super-wealthy on their yachts get a fairly poor view. Most of them give up and sit in their Jacuzzis watching the race on the tv. Most of the sponsors and shareholders watch from the F1 paddock club or a hotel balcony over the circuit. The die hard (and still fairly wealthy) fans watch from grandstands behind safety fencing.

But I have the best ticket in the place. I started my race at the iconic Lowes Hairpin (yes I know it`s not called that anymore and I don`t care) then into the tunnel, before catching the action at the Nouvell Chicane, I walked back past the gin palaces and stopped briefly at the swimming pool chicane and then positioned myself in time for a front row seat at the podium presentation.

It`s not all glitz and glamour in Monaco and it certainly isn`t the prettiest place on the planet.
You do feel that you have entered God`s waiting room and you have to be constantly aware of where you are treading so as to avoid the Chihuahua shit that is ever-present on every street corner.

But to be honest who cares?

For this one week each year rules don`t matter. You can spend as much money as you like, you can wear ridiculous fashions, you can hang out with even bigger egos than your own, you can be more exuberant and outrageous than anyone else. You can bathe in Veuve Clicquot, have caviar on your cornflakes, you can do whatever you like. It`s Monaco. And they are never going to create a new one!

Boats v Planes

Everyone has by now had a good laugh at my travel woes of the past few weeks. I arrived into the Barcelona paddock this week to endless witty comments, general mickey taking and a strange sense of achievement that we had actually won the prize for the best return journey home through the volcanic ash from the Chinese GP.

When I say `Best` I mean `Worst`. We all agreed that before leaving China in different directions we would have a prize for the best return journey and the dramas involved. Little did I know that I would win? The sad thing is, we decided that the prize for the winners would be a photographic print of Michael Schumacher donated by myself. Second prize would be an autographed Michael Schumacher print.

So anyway, having put up with a weeks piss-taking, I was looking forward to an easy couple of weeks travel to the Spanish GP and then heading to the best race of the year in Monaco. But no, look-out, here comes that bloody ash cloud again.

OK, so we are not in China, we can easily drive or take the train to Monaco, I have local currency to spend, I can even sort-of speak the language, it even looks like I am going to avoid jail this week. But why should I be subjected to these hassles?

Every time I even think about going near an airport nowadays some sort of drama happens. In the past few months, I have been delayed in London. Lost my luggage in Madrid. Had my flight cancelled in Shanghai. Had an engine blow up on take-off in Zurich. And as I now sit here in Spain, they are announcing that my airport is closed in Barcelona!
This is even before British Airways decides to go on strike!
They have just announced their next strike dates. They have handily planned it for the same days that everyone will fly to the Turkish GP and then the following fortnight, the Canadian GP. How very convenient!!

Now, in my opinion 2 members of the F1 paddock have it spot on.

Mike Gascoyne and Vijay Mallya are heading from this race to the next on their private yachts. This is far more sensible.
Nobody can delay a boat sailing. Nobody closes harbours because of a bit of ash. When you put your luggage on a boat and get to your destination, it is still there. Should your boat blow an engine on departure, you glide to a gentle halt in a harbour rather that falling out of the sky.

Boats have other advantages; You don`t have to queue to get on your own boat, you don`t have to sit next to a sweaty stranger on your own boat. You can take as much liquid as you like on your own boat. And you can even be trusted with a pair of scissors! You can eat when you like, sleep when you like and you certainly don`t need showing where the emergency exits are!

Think about it, boats are the way forward.